Being a woman in Tech events

It's important to me that I share what happened in last night's event.

I am a co-founder in a Brazilian fintech. I am working on a new project in California. I work mostly from home, with 2 remote people. So whenever I can, I get out of the house to connect with new people and keep myself sane. I prioritize meetings and chats over coffee as a way to rebuild my network, after being away in Brazil and Australia for the last 6 years. Every once in a while I pick a networking event to go.

The first challenge in these startup/tech events is picking the right person to approach. Not only to optimize networking, but quite frankly to stay away from douche-bags. The safe approach is to always talk to another woman, and perhaps that is why you sometimes see a group of women chatting away in a corner.

But hey, it's 2017 and everybody wants to mingle. So everything was great in yesterday's SDVG (San Diego Venture Group) event — great local beer, amazing ocean views and good people — until this guy approaches me to know what I do. I start explaining that I am finalizing an MVP version of my product and should be launching soon. I noticed he was drunk and started thinking of ways to move on to the next chat.

Then he says: "In your app, can I pick an user by how hot she is?"
- "No, you can't. That will not be a filter option"
- "But can I just browse through pictures?"
- "You should try and use Tinder. That's the appropriate app for what you need" I said laughing, trying to hide my growing frustration. I thought he would stop, laugh and part his way, when he said:
- "I don't want to use Tinder, I want to use your app to find healthy good looking girls to interact."
- "Sorry. You need to talk to someone else. This is not a conversation that interests me at all" is what I replied as I turned my back and walked away.

I was really pissed off. It's 2017, Uber and 500 startups just lost their leaders for sexual misconducts, and this random guy just tried to demoralize me and my product with sexist comments. So for all the folks out there that think sexist comments are isolated, it's not. It happens in offices everywhere and nice summer afternoons with ocean views, surrounded by CEOs, founders and investors.

I am still pissed off. I didn't get his name. But as they say in Brazil, "machistas não passarão", sexist-pricks will not be tolerated.